It seems like, every time I turn around, a new blog has posted something I am interested in or an entirely new blog has been created. For the longest time, my thought was, “What’s the big deal?” I was never in to writing in high school and, for some reason, the whole “xanga” phase missed me.

On top of my lack of interests, there were also hesitations. I began to think about all of the blogs I knew of that only had a few subscribers or posts that were not considered “high-traffic”. Doubts immediately fill my head about the interest in my posts, the solidification of anything on the internet, and the work required to keep up a successful blog. The idea has been dismissed time and time again (without much difficulty).

At the risk of stating the obvious, you are reading a blog post from yours truly. What changed? There were several supporting factors that inspired the creation of this blog. Besides the fact that it just makes you into a better person, here’s why you should start one too.

Skill Development

As I mentioned previously, I was never really that excited about writing in high school. But through competitive speech and debate, I quickly grew to enjoy the art of communication. Being able to verbally inform, persuade, and motivate an audience really excited me. I also met my lovely wife through speech and debate so you could say that I came out with a great deal more than a sharpened tongue.

I was able to take the same communication skills with me to college. In my English and technical writing courses, those skills proved to be invaluable. Blogging is a way to continually improve my communication abilities and sharpen my mind in the process.

Creative Mindset

One of the greatest gifts that God gave to man is the mind. It controls actions, abilities, talent, and dedication. My dad always said, “You can do anything you set your mind to.” I can honestly say that, until I began making the effort a few years ago to sharpen my mind, I never really understood or appreciated the magnitude of that statement. Blogging forces me to constantly think and work my brain to think creatively. It also allows an outlet for my creativity that does not come from music, exercise, or other hobbies.

Professional Development

I work hard to constantly better myself. Writing and thinking at a creative level were both areas that I knew were not being constantly challenged. I needed something that would effectively put these attributes to work. I honestly believe that the sharpening of these skills will spill over into my job and the rest of my life. Challenging myself is the best way to grow into a better professional tomorrow.

Just remember that perfection is your enemy when it comes to blogging. The challenge of posting and actually doing it are what contribute most effectively to these reasons. Being a perfect editor is a fantastic skill and ability. But if you let the need to create a perfect post keep you from actually posting it, you’re not going to get much out of it at all. Once you’ve started your blog, shoot me an email. I’d be honored to be your first subscriber.

– Andrew

We all go through different stages in our lives. Think about defining moments (buying your first house, having your first child, graduating from college, your first “real” job, etc.). Looking back, all of these things marked a very clear transition between the person you were before and the person you became afterwards. They demonstrated that life is completely different after they occur. Stages can be beautiful, terrible, and horrifying all at the same time. The most interesting thing about stages is that none of them are set up just for the sake of having a stage. They are all meant to enhance the job and performance of the actors.

It’s easy to fall into the trap of believing that life is against you. We tend to see how the stage is set up and are absolutely dumbfounded by how terrible it is. Our day-to-day activities are filled with how we wish the stage were different, how it could be better set up, and what we should do to fix it. We don’t enjoy acting on stages that we feel are less than we deserve. But consider the audience…

Audiences love to be entertained. No question. Large groups of people are so easily enticed, it’s not even funny. But we can talk about football, fights, and strip clubs some other time. The point is that set designers often go all out. The idea is to enhance the performance but, as a member of the audience, it is easy to get lost in the construction and beauty of the stage and completely miss several scenes during the production. When the setting is horrible, you have no choice but to focus on how the actor behaves and responds.

We can easily look past the wonderful job that the other actors are doing when their stages are seemingly set up so much more perfectly than ours. We can fall into the trap of wanting other stages that are set up for other actors and disregarding the performance entirely.

Forget the stage you’re in. God set it up and put you in it for a reason, so go out and perform. Worrying about the stage isn’t your job nor is it in your realm of control. Worrying about you and how you respond is not just controllable, but it’s your responsibility. Looking at others either makes you upset about your own stage or grateful that your stage is better than another actor’s. But if that other actor is performing well relative to his or her stage, that makes you mad, anyway!

Do yourself a favor and act well, regardless of what stage you’re in. Life goes by much more easily when you worry about you and not everyone else. It’s just life. Enjoy the production.

– Andrew

“Let the leader among you become one who serves.” – Jesus, Luke 22

Our society has a very twisted view about what leadership looks like. We see leaders as people who stand out from the crowd. They constantly outperform and outdo their peers. They outwork those around them. None of these are inherently bad qualities until we separate them from what a leader really is, first and foremost: a servant.

“You can have everything in life you want if you’ll help enough other people get what they want.” – Zig Ziglar

The concept and execution aren’t difficult. Find someone you can help today. Cooped up in an office all day? Buy a “thank you” note on your way home from work and resolve to put it written and addressed to someone tomorrow morning. Encouragement and appreciation are two things that all people want. Pass it on when you receive it and, even if you don’t, take time to show others that they are valuable and mean something to you.

Being a servant leader is about looking past what you want and focusing on others. Is it karma that makes this whole concept work in your favor? Not at all. Serving others makes you into a better and more humble person – the kind that people are willing to follow.

Be creative in finding ways to serve (volunteer, make breakfast for your spouse, give of your time and financial resources, etc.) The list is endless – you should have no trouble finding ways to help out. Here’s one. Here’s another. Go get to serving.

– Andrew

I recently spent a Saturday morning in an old-fashioned barber shop playing dominoes with gentlemen three-to-four times my age. At first glance, I realize that statement makes it seem like I’ve lost my mind. To be quite honest, I came for the haircut and I stayed because of a long wait in line. Playing dominoes was a great way to pass the time.

Some say that, in order to know the future, you must know and remember the past…

That’s stupid.

I take a much more “Hakuna Matata” kind of approach. Your past is your past, and it needs to be put behind you. If your past is full of good memories and awesome times, that’s great! You should never quit. Keep doing incredible things.

If your past is full of darkness, ugly people, and horrible experiences, I understand. That being said, a past like that should be forgotten and left in the dust of your shoes forever.

The only purpose that your past serves is to spring you forward. Last year, my father-in-law, a couple of my brothers-in-law, and I all went and hiked across the Grand Canyon in a couple of days.

 

The experience was probably the hardest thing I have ever done and was also absolutely amazing. The beautiful scenery, trail food, long talks, great company, and astounding weather all combined to make a truly unforgettable experience. That picture is still on my desktop background as one of my favorites from that trip.

I think it would be very easy for me to assume that the Grand Canyon is the best hike I will probably ever take. It might even be safe to assume that, in lieu of a pending adoption, I may not be able to do that again until my child is old enough to come with me. The point that those assumptions become dangerous is when I decide to not take any more trips or hikes until that point. Excuses tend to creep in that say, “I already took a big trip this year.” “I’m still recovering from the last one…” “You can’t travel like that again so soon after a vacation.”

The trip was awesome. Why stop there? Your past is intended to provide you a path forward…a vision. My wife and I are headed to China in two weeks and I couldn’t be more excited. I got an idea in my head yesterday for an overseas trip next year as well that we’ve already started talking about.

“Down is optional. Up is mandatory.” – Grand Canyon Trail Sign

Keep looking outward and moving forward. Each step to the top of a hill could lead to an even bigger mountain in the distance. Look back occasionally and see the hills you’ve climbed already, but that doesn’t help you with the rest of the way. Will we ever get to the top? Gosh, I hope not. I’m having way too much fun on the trip up.

– Andrew

 Unfortunately, many people limit how high they can go because of attitudes that they have. Three specifically, are rampant in our society today and hinder the production of people around the world every day. These three attitudes are sneaky, destructive, and especially harmful in the life of a professional. It is my desire that you will read, understand, and that we will fight the status quo by producing a new kind of person. We want one that is not like everyone else. We want a better professional. Without further ado, here are three attitudes that, simply, have to go.

 1. Mediocrity

 Listed first because it is arguably the most harmful and the most prevalent in our society, mediocrity harms the effectiveness and quality of life for people everywhere. We live in a world that says, “That’s good enough.” Think about a classic movie, any at all will do. Think about how the men and women were dressed up for day-to-day activity. Maybe we did not see them actually perform a task to it’s fullest, but you at least know that they cared enough about their appearances to put a lot of effort (or teams of movie makeup artists) in to looking like they knew what they were doing.

 Is appearance everything? Absolutely not. But it is no secret that performance is increased when you are dressed to the nine. As I write this, I am thinking very strongly about taking off my sweatshirt and putting on a suit. We have gradually began to settle for “good enough” instead of pushing for optimum performance. Having this attitude in your life is the mental equivalent to going into the office and playing on Facebook all day. Do your job, whatever that may be, well and to the absolute best of your ability. It will take you much further than someone who stopped at work that was “good enough.”

 2. Negativity

 This second attitude is one that hampers creativity and goal setting like no other. If you are not constantly feeding your brain with positive input, negativity will creep its way in and lock your mental door behind itself. You know those people that just exude happiness? Those are good examples. I know they can be annoying at times but trust me. Much more is accomplished through smiles and enjoyment of work than ever was with frowns and negativity. Honestly, with as busy and productive as you are, you can’t afford to not have a “pep in your step.”

 The best way to overcome negativity is to completely get it out of your life. Start thinking about how you feel in certain situations and monitor the input. Granted, some of those situations are unavoidable. But as you’re missing the next few sentences I write while thinking about situations, you realize that many of them are. Think about how you feel after watching that show on television vs. playing a musical instrument. Once you have determined your “triggers”, avoid them at all costs. Some triggers are people. Love them, tell them Jesus loves them, don’t let them camp out in your office. Smile, and enjoy your day as the world smiles back.

 3. Impossibility

 More so than the two aforementioned attitudes, you seriously don’t have time for this one. Don’t ever let someone tell you that a task “can’t be done.” Many people waste their time thinking about ways that something can’t be done as opposed to using their energy for constructive ways that it can be done. Which do you think is more valuable to your company/church/family? Where this attitude takes root most often is in procrastination.

 That is not to say that, if you are a procrastinator, you feel like something can’t be done. Sometimes you just feel like it shouldn’t be done right then. For whatever reason, that task is not worth your time at the moment because putting it off is more important. It seems impossible for you to get it done in a timely manner as it should be. For example, the day before yesterday dragged on at work for me because I came into work with the attitude to accomplish my to-do list. Even though the list was fairly lengthy, I ended up doing more than I anticipated and actually dragged out some of the tasks so that I would have enough to do over the course of the day. In contrast, yesterday flew by because I woke up with an attitude to get all of the hard stuff done first. I didn’t like the way I had felt a couple of days ago. Armed with a new attitude, my brain and productivity rewarded me for it. Decide that, whatever needs to be done, it can be done quickly and effectively.

 You are in control of how you feel about life. You cannot decide what happens to you. That is reserved for God, alone. But you can determine your attitude. Keep these “Big 3” out and insert positive thoughts, and you will be a better person and professional as a result. Let’s change the world one mind and heart at a time. After all, if bad attitudes are contagious, so are good ones.  

– Andrew

“Never be normal!” – Ron Stoppable 

Melissa Joy – My beautiful wife. She loves and cares for all that she sees who are hurting or in need. She teaches me how to cook. She can charm and sweet talk just about anyone. My wife has taught me so much in the time that we have been married. I know her habits, her dreams, and her favorite color. Every day I wake up and thank God that I married her. I never dreamed that I would laugh and have as much fun in my marriage as I do. Each day I am reminded that there is no one like her, and I’m glad that there never will be. She is mine and she’s the best.

Michael Jordan – Greatest ever. He still holds records in the National Basketball Association and at the University of North Carolina. His trademark image (pictured above) is internationally known. He is who any non-basketball fanatic thinks of when they think of the sport at all. His worst moments are forgotten. His best moments are legendary.

Michael Jackson – King of pop. (No picture due to no international logo and no beautiful face – he didn’t meet the criteria.) He changed the face and sound of pop music for all time. He ran point (basketball reference) for the Jackson 5, introduced America to the concept of the “Moon Walk,” starred in Disney productions, and still remains to be one of the greatest influences in pop music as we know it.

Mary Jane – Spiderman’s significant other.

What’s the point?

All of these individuals are incredible in their own right. If your initials are “M.J.”, you probably have some of their awesomeness flowing through your veins by default. Are they without their respective mistakes? Absolutely not. The point is, what makes these people great isn’t what they can do or have done. What makes them great in our eyes is that, as far as we can see, there has never been or ever will be anyone like them.

“Be yourself, because everyone else has already been taken.” – Oscar Wilde 

I love this quote. You have been created to be you, not anyone else. Your uniqueness is something both external and internal that no one else can take from you. I’m not the only one who sees it. Being different from everyone else increases your value to those around you, including your employer, friends, and family. Why? Because they can’t get you anywhere else. Embrace that and be thankful that you’re not like everyone else.

That being said, there are definitely better and worse versions of you. I’m not suggesting at all that you should let yourself go (Frozen, anyone?) and be lazy all of the time because that’s who you are. Why not? That’s being like everyone else. There are plenty of people on the planet who are different in a terrible way – that makes them like everyone else. Very few are different/unique in a good way. Being yourself means being the very best version that you can possibly be. It empowers others to see you and want the same.

– Andrew

Here we are. Finally. A day that we have been working towards since December of last year has finally arrived. It has not come without its hardships, tears, work, or even support. It is a day that my wife and I have been anticipating for quite some time now (before we were actually married, really).

We have finally submitted all of our adoption paperwork!!!

Let’s all let the magnitude of that concept soak in for a moment. (If you think this is stupid, you obviously don’t know how many trees are killed with every adoption and home study application…)

During the application phase, every day we delayed was a day longer we had to wait. Now, every day we wait is a day closer to seeing our baby for the first time! When I first knew I wanted to write about this, I really did consider sparing the details of how the whole process worked. Now I’m more convinced than ever of it’s importance and the meaning in every step. Adopting is definitely not easy. But the journey is one that we will never forget.

My wife and I had always known that we would adopt some day (she made that very clear before we ever got engaged). I had always thought that we would have some biological children before actually adopting. But we found out this past November that, through circumstances beyond either of our control, that timeline has been switched up a bit.

We spent about a week trying to decide what to do next. The decision was pretty blatantly obvious, now that I think about it. We really needed to come to grips with the fact that we did not have all that much control over our situation. As a result, we went and did something about it – the only thing at the time we could control.

After talking with my wife’s extended family who had also adopted, we were able to make an informed decision regarding an agency and location (domestic, not international). As it turns out, about a month later we would find ourselves in the same city as the agency! A quick phone call later and we are registered for the adoption seminar that they are conducting while we are in the area! It really is an insane shift in events and mindset when you go from feeling like God, Himself, is against you to things falling into place so quickly.

Upon arriving home, no time was wasted in finding an agency here through which we could have our home study conducted. This process is when the agency and a social worker partner together to conduct interviews, see your house, and ask tons of questions through paperwork to determine if you are fit for parenthood. This is a fairly drawn out process as it requires background checks, applications, and 1-on-1 visits. The social worker we found lives about an hour away and was able to meet us twice while we were on our way home from various trips. We are currently in the multi-week window waiting for the home study to be finalized and approved by both agencies (the one in-state and the one in the state we are adopting from).

The last piece of the puzzle was our profile. This is basically a book that is shown to prospective birth mothers (matching your specifications) that they use to decide if they want you to be the adoptive parents of their child. That looks really weird when I type it out but there really isn’t another way to say it. That’s what it is. My wife and I are both fairly creative and she really took the lead on this one. She gathered the pictures, made the book, and typed up the majority of the content. That’s not to say that I didn’t have my opinion heard as well. In every step of the profile creation, she constantly asked my viewpoint on the aesthetics, allowed me to write content, and brainstorm the formatting. We submitted the completed profile earlier this week.

I am incredibly grateful for such a great partner/teammate/best friend/wife through this entire process. I know for a fact that it could not have been done without her strength, love, and dedication. As a team, we can’t wait to meet our baby. It’s really amazing how you can love something that isn’t even born yet. Our prayers are with the birth mother as well as anyone who receives hope or inspiration from our journey.

We’ll keep you posted.

– Andrew